It’s Not You. It’s Me.

How being single is a choice.

It’s Not You. It’s Me.

A note from the wild.

I don’t date.

It’s not bitterness. It’s not fear. It’s just… not where I am. My sense of happiness and accomplishment isn’t tied to romantic milestones. I don’t need another person to validate the life I’ve built. I like my own company. I like what I bring to the table. Right now, that’s enough.

Still, I admire the hell out of those of you who go for it. Who swipe, who dress up, who stay open. Who keep risking your heart for the chance at something real. I root for you. I also worry for you.

And if I were to join you, if I were to open that door again, I’d know exactly what I’d want. Not a checklist, but a vision. A man worth going out on a limb for.

He was raised in a house full of women and carries that reverence for feminine strength. He loves my daughter like she’s always been his. He has friends who speak well of him behind his back and a job that gives him purpose. He’s kind to strangers. Curious about everything. Always up for an adventure.

He lets me light up a room and watches me do it with pride. He gets excited when we make plans. He puts on Sinatra when we cook. He meets me in sweatpants and sees right through to the parts of me no one else notices, the quirks, the tenderness, the way I treat people. He imagines us when we are old.

He has integrity. He can dance. He shows up. Every time. He doesn’t mind making me feel as safe as I need. He does it because he wants to.

He treats my mom like royalty. He smiles when I’m not looking. We come first, always. We build a home full of warmth, with room for everyone—big dinners, quiet nights, music in the air. We work hard and play harder. We stay wild and grow wise.

He never lets go of my hand, not even when I do.

He drives a Bronco, a vintage one. He’s sexy as hell. And he showed up when I least expected it.

The end.

*Written to “I Love Her Shadow” by Arcade Fire.”